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What Is "Klopex?"
Herein is contained the dazzling history behind the word that created an empire!

  • The Creation

  • During the time I was in college, I lived in a dorm that had a vent above the shower.  The vent was connected to the other dorm downstairs.  Married housing was on the first floor and men's housing was on the second.  To keep the married folks aware that we could hear them, I tried to make enough noise in the shower to let them hear me. 

    I would frequently say crazy stuff while I took my shower like, "Harvey, get out of here, there is not enough room for all three of us!!!"  (Disclaimer: I was alone.)  Eventually, I started making up silly commercials including one series about a ubiquitous product to treat ailments of the"Red Necks."  This product could be used for sore muscles, tooth aches, chronic itching, squeeky hinges, hair loss, automotive trouble, udder balm (for cattle), suntan lotion, etc...  Klopex became defined as a salve that rivaled WD-40, and Duct Tape for applicability.

  • The Identity

  • I bought my first computer in 1995.  Not very long after that, AOL started offering unlimited internet access for $20.00 a month.  Before that, it was several dollars per minute and everyone had very slow modems.  When it went unlimited, I and everyone else joined.  Then AOL had only busy signals.  But that is a separate matter...  I created my first AOL account and thought, "What will my name be???"  That's when I first used the word "Klopex" to identify myself.  I tried to get out of AOL after my one free month, but they have this system where they say, "OK, but we have already charged you for your second month.  You started your account a month ago yesterday."  I was sure that I had started it a month ago tomorrow.  AOL got a month of money out of me.  Then I quit a few days early.  The next time I was on AOL, I wrote down the start date.  They tried the trick again but I was not so easily snookered. 

    Oh, I got distracted by my story...  After I left AOL, I kept using klopex as my internet name.  It isn't a word that people use frequently, so I have never had to be klopex1364372@...

  • The First Application

  • A couple years later, I had a summer job at a swimming pool products distribution warehouse.  People who sold and installed swimming pools and spas would buy their products from us.  One thing that we sold was PVC pipe.  When a dealer would buy a pool, we would bundle up the pipe that they purchased. This was a two man job.  One man would hold the bundle while the other person would duct tape the pipe together.  I knew there had to be a better way! 

    So, I took apart an old pallet and cut the wood.  Then I made my creation and I called it Klopex!  Then, I wrote all over it. 

    The Klopex that I built was a stand to hold the PVC while I taped it.  It worked very well.  They continued using it long after I left.  I went back for a visit once and noticed that the Klopex was rather wobbly.  I should have used screws instead of nails!

  • The Spouse

  • I started this web page over a year before I got to this paragraph.  I get distracted...  I have no clue what I was I was planning to put under this heading. 

    I married in 1999.  My wife and I started sharing an email address klopex@...  Maybe that is why I created this heading.  My wife's great!

  • The Domain

  • In July 2002, I finally bought the domain  I had been wanting to buy it sooner, but somebody had already bought it.  He registered it under the name CrAzY MaN, or something like that.  A Canadian, I believe...  I waited a year for his ownership of the domain name to expire.  He never appeared to use it.  I wondered if he had bought several names in hopes that someone would pay him for them.  People who do that are called "squatters".  I didn't have time to mess with the domain name and web site at that time anyway because I was in Grad school.  His ownership expired and I registered the

...And that's the story.  Use this new knowledge for good!

Klopex is a fun part of this nutritious breakfast!

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Online since July 6, 2002